Blunders and Bridges, I know my name

I know my name, I know who I am, I am identified in God by who I am, not by what I am doing. The knowledge of who I am reveals the larger canvas on which God will begin to paint His strokes of destiny. Mine, actually comes from my name. I am “Beth”, meaning in Hebrew, “house’ or “dwelling place”, or it could mean “sanctuary”. And I am “Roma”, which of course is a city and in Latin means “strength”, but in Hebrew it means, “elevated, lofty”.

My sister Becky who went home to meet her maker years ago told me that some people were called to simply hold the presence of God, to be His container to spread His life, His Word, His Truth, wherever they are. In the Old Testament there were such Priests who only attended to God. They only touched the sacred elements and could not touch man. Now I’m not saying that about myself, I am all about people. But I am beginning to see that just maybe God won’t allow me to get boxed in so I can move quickly and go where He may need me, or just spread love, a prayer, or a Word to someone I meet on this journey. To be a place where He is comfortable, a house for His presence or for others to find hope and comfort and to find His love. And a place that is above the scuffle, and above the competition and emotion, a strong house of healing. That’s who I know I am, I am not always on the mark but I am reaching for the goal! No matter who tries to change that or box that in or tell me differently, I know who I am!

I shared that with you because I want to answer your questions about what you are called to do, who you are in God, and what you can do for Him. Just be who you are. It bears true in what the Apostle Paul said prior to his speech of encouragement in

2Corinthians 4:7 “But we have this treasure in earthen vessels.” He places his gifts, his love, his hope, his abilities, his presence, Himself in our vessel… but that’s just it, everyone around us, I know those around me, knows that a simple person cannot be what we are without a divine calling. That makes it miraculous. And yes I am a miracle worker! That's for you "Shepherd's Door" people.

Yes, I admit there have been many disappointments in my life; many times I did call it quits only to come back and repent. Many things I’ve done out of the need for my own personal welfare. And although there may not be regret regarding some of these, they may not be best for where God is taking me. So God took the mistakes, and blunders and is turning them into bridges, which lead to His purpose.

Again, the enemy blunders by thinking he can defeat anyone belonging to the God that controls everything. But the enemy tries to trip us up if we aren’t on our proper path.

So it is imperative that we know who we are before we can actually know that we are going in the right direction. If you don’t know who you are, begin to ask God to reveal it to you. Maybe through circumstances, maybe through your own suffering, or through someone you love. You’ll be surprised how you might find it. And you have to listen with tuned in ears. I have to admit that as the seasons have changed so has my activity level and opportunity. But my purpose has never changed. Who I am has never changed.

Years ago, our family was in crisis. Wes and I having left both of our jobs had no immediate income. We still had two kids in school, a school we couldn’t afford anymore, and so I had to home school our kids. We were launching out into new territory. My husband Wes was really distressed, not knowing where the next paycheck might even possibly come from and he showed it with a furrowed brow. He and my son, Britt, were riding in the car one day; my son was twelve years old at the time. He looked at his Dad and said, “Dad, don’t look so worried, I hate to see you like this. How bad can it be? So we lose everything, as long as we have each other, we’re gonna be okay”. My husband said immediately he heard the voice of God through our son and from that point on a new faith arose in him. As he began to trust, of course God provided for us. Just don’t close your Spiritual ears or your carnal ears for that, you’ll get your answer.

And I believe that whatever you do for God will bring joy and not dread. If you dread it, it’s not your purpose. I also know that if you have to strain to do it and work hard to even make it happen, it’s not for you, you weren’t made for that thing. Does a vase have to strain at holding water? Only if it is flawed into forgetting what it does by getting a hole, then it can no longer serve that purpose. You will be comfortable with God’s call for you. That’s just my belief. And if you don’t think you are at first, maybe you just didn’t know it was in there, and you become comfortable later on!

But it takes a death to understand who God is in you! And not just one death, but also a continual dying to yourself. If you really want to be who you were made to be for Him then understand that the process of Life in Him also demand a laying down of your own life.

You need to start figuring out who you are…you are so vulnerable if you’ve never settled the question of your identity.

Maybe you were raised by a value system that taught you that you were suppose to lose, or in a society that tells you that people who believe in Jesus shouldn’t expect much out of life. Or you were always limited in your home environment as a child or maybe now as an adult.

If you continue to be blind to who you are, you’ll always stay in the chicken coup instead of soaring like you can. I like that one!

You must accept that you are redeemed, forgiven, bought, and mighty in God…within your purpose…in Him you move and live and have your being.

And listen, don’t go to God and expect to tell Him the plans you’ve made for your life and ask Him to endorse them.

He knew who you were before you were formed in your Mother’s womb and He has a purpose for you…according to Jeremiah.

The blunder in your life, whether it is a sickness, or an attack on your family, job or marriage…or a simple wrong decision that you now realize wasn’t right, these things can be turned into a huge bridge for the power of God to be released into lives around you as well as your own. We must learn to forgive when blunders are made…then we must learn to wait for the bridge, and then by God’s grace walk over it into our opportunity. And knowing this, wouldn’t is be great if we didn’t rush through the times when the horrific things were happening in our lives. Learn to abide in God in the place where the bridge is being built for you, ask God to speak and soon you’ll have the vision to see the bridge and the faith to walk over it.

2 Cor 2:14-15 14 Now thanks be to God who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and through us diffuses the fragrance of His knowledge in every place.

15 For we are to God the fragrance of Christ among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing.

We have to hold Him to diffuse Him. Think about it.

I love you all,

Roma Beth, His Strong Elevated House

Blunders and Bridges

Blunders and Bridges

I know many of you have found yourselves in a place of hurting. If not in the recent past, at some point in your life.

And in these places I am beginning to understand what the Holy Spirit is doing in me and what I believe He is trying to do in all of us.

I don’t think you can’t know who you are in God until you know who God is in you.

The bible teaches us that God is love, He is the awesome giver…well just look at how love is described in the book of Corinthians and you will see the reflection of the divine.

Love is patient, kind, I’m sure you follow me.

This God whom we serve is neither divisive nor destruction, nor can He be.

James 1:17-18

17 Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.

18 Of His own will He brought us forth by the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of His creatures.

On the other hand we read and are taught by this same Word, that the enemy comes into our situations, he presents himself only to kill, to steal and to destroy.

Our enemy is neither omnipresent, nor is he omnipotent…he cannot discern the thoughts of redeemed people unless they reveal them to him.

He is not infallible, he makes mistakes….he throws fiery darts and darts don’t always hit the target. How many times have you played darts and hit the bull’s eye every single time? Okay, okay, maybe I'm in the minority, but it is rarely the case.

In his attempt to overthrow God in your life, he often slips up and makes a mistake.

These are the things I call the “enemies' blunders”, but I can see how God always uses these blunders in the life of the redeemed person to bridge them into something bigger and better.

They are used as a bridge to an even greater divine purpose.

In Moses' account of creation, amidst the garden, the serpent deceived the woman and ultimately brought man to rebellion and sin…however this deceptive strategy resulted in the plan of redemption!!! That's the up side isn't it?

What a tragic mistake the enemy made when he had Joseph’s brothers turn against him and throw him in a pit…and sold into slavery. I personally like this one.

From the pit…to the second in command to Pharaoh and ultimately being responsible for the preservation of a nation. After that huge blunder, things only went up from there for Joseph. Yeah so his beautiful prized coat was stolen and his identity was even taken, no one could ever take the great dreamer and ruler out of Joseph.

Let me stop here and say, some of you may feel you have lost your identity in God. Maybe you quit going to church, or there are questions you can't answer, or so much has happened you feel like a lost soul. Listen, no one can take away who you are. God made you, and only He knows who you really are, and He will manifest it if you remain faithful. He will find you when it's time, even if you're in a foreign land, figuratively, or literally!

What a mistake the enemy made when he had the crowd to stone Stephen…because standing in the shadows holding everyone’s cloaks, was the man who was adamantly persecuting the Christians. He would soon become the great Apostle Paul…who wrote much of the New Testament.

There are so many biblical accounts of blunders that led to a place of great significance.

When Jesus laid down His life on that fateful day when He was crucified, and the darkness covered the sun, God turned his face, and I’m sure the enemy forces were laughing. They really thought that this event on Golgotha was their pinnacle of success. But Paul wrote that had the rulers of this age, who were influenced by evil, known the end result of their mistake, they would not have crucified the Lord of Glory.

By making the mistake of crucifying our Lord, the enemy put it within Jesus’ power to make a public spectacle of him and even conquer death hell and the grave.

In your own life how many times can you see how the enemy has struck at you only to have you come back even stronger in that area?

I can attest to the fact that many times the area that I am struggling in, once I have finally overcome, and sometimes even before I have overcome, is the area that God brings those who have needs into my life. When Jesus was being tempted in the wilderness by His enemy, those once He overcame them, He was reinforced in those areas and they became as solid as steel. In other words, the next time He was tempted by His ego to either go against God's Word, or Worship something other than His Father, or to allow Himself to be tempted by something, He would remember the wilderness experience, He would remember how He looked the enemy square in the eyes and said, His piece.

I hope we can all say that we have had times when we have been able to look our enemy in the eye and said "NO!" Or been able to overcome when the sadness of a loss or a hurt even unto death comes over us. I know I can, I know what grief feels like, I've seen it in almost physical shape just standing in front of me trying to keep me from moving. But today, I decided I will not allow it to stop me. I have the power to knock it down. And then when it comes again, I will say, "Hey remember what I did to you last time?" "Well, get ready cause here I come!" ...If you could hear me I would sing it for you, but you can't...well anyway, you get the point.

One more scripture to nail this down for you;

Dan 7:21-22

21 "I was watching; and the same horn was making war against the saints, and prevailing against them,

22 "until the Ancient of Days came, and a judgment was made in favor of the saints of the Most High, and the time came for the saints to possess the kingdom.

This man Daniel had a vision, taken into captivity by the Babylonians while just a teenager, he became an advisor to the government and became a prophetic dreamer.

Daniel saw in his visions how the enemy was released to make war with God’s saints for a limited time, but that when the ancient of days came in, finally, then the time came for the saints to possess the Kingdom.

You see again, the enemy blunders by thinking he can defeat anyone belonging to a God that controls everything because He is the all in all, He is everything! Let that hit you for a moment!

I love Daniel’s description of God, the Ancient of Days...

Dan 7:9-14

9 "I watched till thrones were put in place, and the Ancient of Days was seated; his garment was white as snow, and the hair of His head was like pure wool. His throne was a fiery flame, its wheels a burning fire;

10 A fiery stream issued and came forth from before Him. A thousand thousands ministered to Him; ten thousand times ten thousand stood before Him. The court was seated, and the books were opened.

11 "I watched then because of the sound of the pompous words which the horn was speaking; I watched till the beast was slain, and its body destroyed and given to the burning flame.

12 "As for the rest of the beasts, they had their dominion taken away, yet their lives were prolonged for a season and a time.

13 "I was watching in the night visions, and behold, One like the Son of Man, coming with the clouds of heaven! He came to the Ancient of Days, and they brought Him near before Him.

14 Then to Him was given dominion and glory and a kingdom, that all peoples, nations, and languages should serve Him. His dominion is an everlasting dominion, which shall not pass away, and His kingdom the one which shall not be destroyed.

See, what the enemy forgets is that this all knowing, all ruling God does not forget and he specializes in taking those things intended to cause defeat, broken lives, ruined circumstances and decay and He turns them into His victory.

It's real easy in our culture which has the all the tabloids and TV shows which concentrate on every move celebrities and political figures make, focusing on their blunders, even laying in wait for them to make a mistake for the entertainment value. It's easy for us to judge people by their blunders, but God often uses people because of their blunders.

Well, that's enough for now, but I'm not done, next time I’ll go a little further into blunders being turned into bridges, I don't think I even got to the good stuff. This is my first closing....ha, ha, ha!

I'm excited to be writing again and feel this is the time to reconnect with you by revisiting some of the messages that ministered to you the most.

I’m here to tell you to lift up your eyes and your countenance, joy always comes in the morning. And It’s never too late to see that joy coming over the hill. God is in control!

Until next time,

Roma and Pastor, when you need one!

Leaving Myself and Celebrating the Season

Hello everyone! Don't let the exclamation mark throw you off, I am not in an extraordinarily chipper mood, but I am glad to be writing you. So I use the mark for you, and not to express myself. I'm really not that low, it's just hard to begin to explain where I've been, I wouldn't even know how to start. Maybe I should just go with the flow and let it happen.

Let's see, I have been dealing with my own world which has seemed very much like a ride in an amusement park with the ups and downs. Dealing with relationships can be that way, they are filled with promise and pain, hope and despair, love and loneliness. I've been dealing with exhaustion and my Mother's declining health, jumping from Dr. to Dr. to find her help, only to be told it is her journey and she will probably remain on this journey until she goes heavenward. Only she can decide how much work she wants to put into staying in her body a little longer. If I were her, given that choice, I'm not sure what I would do. I simply have to learn how to manage her and provide the best environment for her while she makes her decisions.

I've missed sharing with you, but I'm sure if you were anything like me, your late summer into fall, and the Holidays have been very busy. Did it seem to you like everything went by way too fast? Maybe it was because I was so busy, but it all hit me like a freight train, Thanksgiving (smack!)...Christmas (smack!)....New Years (smack!)...AND.........it's over!!! And there's no caboose! Have you all noticed that there are no red cabooses anymore? I think I am sometimes just very nonobservant, but I didn't know that trains didn't have cabooses anymore until a few years ago when my Grandson was into trains. I was waiting for the caboose and telling him to look for it. And it never came! This disturbed me. Oh well, another fond childhood image stolen from my clutches!! But, I barely had time to stop and realize it was the Holidays. It took me leaving my house, and even my state to find the true solitude expected of the season. The weekend after Christmas we went to Nashville to visit our son, Britt. We entered his small townhouse and enjoyed a small family dinner and then had our Christmas. My Grandson, Asher, now six years old, played our Santa, hat and all! As I sat with family all around me, something settled over me. I thought at first it was gratitude or maybe a soft whisper of new hope for a new year. I didn't know, but as I took myself out of the situation and became the observer, I suddenly found serenity in the season. Here I was sitting in my son's home, the same son who could be dead from flipping a jeep a few years ago on a dark lonely road, no longer depressed or sad, but using his gift to help save people's lives. And I looked at my beautiful daughter enjoying her children, the same daughter who faced abuse as a child and denial as an adult so much that she was almost lost to us emotionally. But here she was with her family thriving and enjoying a normal Christmas. Ava my Granddaughter, so sparkly and alive and happy. I remembered the day she was born thinking she would never breath, but she did and now here she was reminding me of a simpler time when I was young and had life ahead of me. And Asher! He was clearly reading all the name tags. He has been reading now for some time. And this is the same child whose parents were told he would probably be behind in school because of a speech impediment. Not this boy!!! We are all such a paradox I thought.

I leaned back into myself again, took a deep breath and took the hand of my husband with whom I'd just celebrated thirty-three years of marriage, and I enjoyed the moment. Nothing could have kept me from just breathing in the peace, joy, hope and love in that room, nothing. These moments are the moments we live for. All the rest is just build up.

For me, I found the miracle of the season where I least expected. And this is how I would explain it, no matter how bad things get or how low I go, there is always hope. And I can get pretty low, you know, crawling on the floor...boo hooing low! I guess what hurts the most to me, and I'm bearing my soul, is rejection. Whether the rejection is from a friend from the past who won't reconnect because you remind them of unpleasant times, even though you, yourself didn't do a thing! Or by someone who promises they'll always, always be there for you and never abandon you, but before long they are just like the rest, scampering away from you. And the hardest part of rejection is when you realize not only did someone not really want to be your friend, but they were really just using you for other reasons than your friendship. That's a gut clencher. But here's the thing, everyday gives us new mercy and new grace. We simply have to wake up to take it and make it ours. And we don't get it by our own merit or because we earned it or deserve it. Our loving Lord and Savior and the God who created us simply doles it out to us because of His great love. He never gets tired of us, never forgets or abandons us, He never associates us with bad, even when we do the sinning! He took care of that on Calvary and He accepts me with no ability to reject me as His child.

The beginning of a year is always the time to start picking up and using our free mercy everyday if we haven't been. Of course, work on what you have with God, be faithful, but once you've done all to strengthen your relationship with your Father, then know that He picks up the slack. I'm ready for what's ahead, with new mercy on board of course.

I hope you too can celebrate the seasons of life whether bad or good. They all serve a purpose. I have to believe they do. And you must believe it too. Love orchestrated this universe and you are the apple of His eye, so just remember you are on His mind every season, everyday, and you will survive!

Love to all,

Roma